!Free Pdf ♵ Games People Play ☺ Eric Berne – Azizisuperservice.se

!Free Pdf ♱ Games People Play ⚔ We Think We Re Relating To Other People Actually We Re All Playing Games Forty Years Ago, Games People Play Revolutionized Our Understanding Of What Really Goes On During Basic Social Interactions More Than Five Million Copies Later, Dr Eric Berne S Classic Is As Astonishing Revealing As It Was On The Day It Was First Published We Play Games All The Time Sexual Games, Marital Games, Power Games With Our Bosses, Competitive Games With Friends Detailing Status Contests Like Martini I Know A Better Way , To Lethal Couples Combat Like If It Weren T For You Uproar, To Flirtation Favorites Like The Stocking Game Let S You Him Fight, Berne Exposes The Secret Ploys Unconscious Maneuvers That Rule Our Intimate Lives Explosive When It First Appeared, Games People Play Is Now Widely Recognized As The Most Original Influential Popular Psychology Book Of Our Time It S As Powerful Eye Opening As Ever I m glad I read it, but it wasn t ultimately everything that I wanted it to be The theory at the beginning was absolutely fascinating and, even though the books itself is from the 1960 s, it has significant value for being the start of the field of transactional psychology However, the description of the games themselves was where I found the book lacking Mostly, this is where I also felt the impact of the book being so dated Some of his descriptions of games were based on stereotypical gender behavior of that time, but would not be accurate now, nor would his analysis However, I think that a lot could still be learned even from those games if he had gone into further analysis, but he didn t He names the game, goes through a brief write up, but doesn t really delve in What I wanted was to get the description of the game, see an example provided by an analysis, then see an example of the antithesis with similar analysis Only once does he provide an example of an antithesis Possibly this analysis that was missing for me could be found in other supplemental psychological texts or in a class discussion in which this book was assigned However, for someone who is reading on their own for only their own personal benefit, it was lacking Still, this is the historical beginning from which transactional theory arose and, learning about transactional theory for the first time, it was an incredible read. Games People play the psychology of human relationships, 1966, Eric Berne, Esmail Fassih translator Games People Play The Psychology of Human Relationships is a bestselling 1964 book by psychiatrist Eric Berne In the first half of the book, Berne introduces transactional analysis as a way of interpreting social interactions He describes three roles or ego states, known as the Parent, the Adult, and the Child, and postulates that many negative behaviors can be traced to switching or confusion of these roles He discusses procedures, rituals, and pastimes in social behavior, in light of this method of analysis For example, a boss who talks to his staff as a controlling parent will often engender self abased obedience, tantrums, or other childlike responses from his employees The second half of the book catalogues a series of mind games in which people interact through a patterned and predictable series of transactions which are superficially plausible that is, they may appear normal to bystanders or even to the people involved , but which actually conceal motivations, include private significance to the parties involved, and lead to a well defined predictable outcome, usually counterproductive The book uses casual, often humorous phrases such as See What You Made Me Do, Why Don t You Yes But, and Ain t It Awful as a way of briefly describing each game In reality, the winner of a mind game is the person that returns to the Adult ego state first 2002 1366 242 1393 9789647390736 20 Games People Play has a good chapter about dealing with alcoholics, but Berne s ideas and I do mean ideas about women and homosexuals are disgusting and sexist This book was published in the 1960s and it shows Scary to think modern psychologists might actually use it as a text or that college students would have to listen to Berne s ugly ideas about women and gays Nowadays we use research, not ideas. I found the general concept an interesting metaphor rather than a scientifically proven social reality However, I struggled to finish the book It felt like a series of scribbled notes thrown together a set of index cards with brief information on games I needed further explanation and an attempt to engage me rather than having a series of ideas thrown before me. I don t know if this is a reliable textbook for day to day human interaction This might be better retitled Familiar Film Noir Tropes or Perceived and Imagined Slights from Women I ve Never Met or Interpersonal Dilemmas in the Sunday Funnies When was the last time you found yourself embroiled in the classic Now I ve Got You, You Son of a Bitch or Let s Pull a Fast One on Joey Can you solve the riddle of The Frigid Woman This book is mildly amusing but there are too many grievous omissions What about modern day relationship quandaries like the Ambivalence Cha Cha , the Passive Aggressive Shuffle , or the Internet Weenie s Lament Domestic dilemmas like Whose Weed, My Weed , Religious Roomie Roulette and Did you Give me Athlete s Foot Sexual sport like Boudoir blame off and 24k Butthole This book needs a major overhaul. This was apparently a very big thing when it was published in the 70s, and I can see why It s a very interesting way of viewing the world Unfortunately, like many psychology theories, it takes what is a clever conceit that explains some odd aspects of human interaction and then tries to apply it to everything regardless of whether it fits or not Add in some very seventies thought processes which are rather out of favor at the moment but the author probably thought of as universal without realizing how much was a product of the time , and you end up with a rather dated, if still interesting, book.The thesis is that whenever you see people engaged in repetitive interactions that appear to be negative, they re probably getting something out of it subconsciously So while someone in a controlling relationship complains about how much their partner limits them, they secretly both enjoy having something to complain about and are actually afraid of the thing they re being forbidden the reason they chose this partner in the first place is to have an excuse not to have to do the forbidden thing The book then goes on to identify a few dozen of these games Most of them are very familiar, and it s a fruitful way of examining interactions In applicable cases, it not only provides some reasonable explanations for behaviors that seem inexplicable on the surface, getting to the root of the game offers a way to actually break the pattern If you re game playing to feed a deep desire, trying to curtail the surface behavior without addressing the root of the desire will not be particularly effective.However, I think most modern psychologists would say that a number of the games identified have root causes than this text makes out The attempt to extrapolate the theory to apply to all behavior oversimplifies things Just as bad, a number of the observations are deeply sexist, racist, and or homophobic very much products of the time Further, there s an attempt to apply a Freudian framework that I m pretty sure has been mostly discredited by the scientific community in the intervening decades Every problem does not need to be classified as phallic, oral, or anal Really So it s an interesting work with some still applicable ideas Just don t try to apply them too hard. This book is a fascinating psychological journey into the minds of everyday people including, and probably ESPECIALLY, your own Berne s list of psychological games we all play with each other is fascinating, as is what you learn about yourself by analyzing which games you tend to revisit regularly.One little warning When you learn to recognize these games, you will be forced to eliminate at least 95% of the B.S in your life and frequently find yourself disgusted by 100% of the B.S in everyone else s That being said, if you re on a quest for honest communication, this book is indispensable. In this book, Berne argues that a lot of the behaviour you see around you every day can best be understood as different kinds of games A game is a pattern of behaviour usually involving two or perhaps three people There is a series of interactions, followed by an emotional payoff.One of the things I found most interesting is that the classification has two dimensions First, there s the game itself Second, there s the question of how seriously you re playing he divides this into First Degree, Second Degree and Third Degree First Degree is just playing for fun Second Degree means people s feelings can be badly hurt Third Degree means that the game ends up in the courts, the hospital or the morgue So let me give you an example There s this game he calls RAPO one of the most appealing aspects of the book is the witty labels he s made up for the different games First Degree RAPO is a game you can see being played at almost any party The first person, most often a woman, flirts with the second person, most often a man, until he expresses some concrete sexual interest Then she frowns and moves on, leaving him feeling like a bit of a jerk Her payoff is satisfaction that she s managed to discomfit him and reassurance that she has sexual power, but it s basically harmless.In Second Degree RAPO, the first party leads the second party on until, again, he s made some kind of advances Then she gets openly indignant Maybe she tells him loudly to keep his hands off her, or she phones her friends and says that he s such a lecherous creep Second Degree RAPO is a pretty nasty game, because it is of course impossible for third parties to know whether the accusations are true or not Maybe the guy is just a lecherous creep.In Third Degree RAPO, the first party may get as far as having consensual sex with the second party She then calls the police and formally accuses him of rape Third Degree RAPO is, fortunately, not that common It s clear that it can easily destroy people s lives.I thought it was insightful to point out that all of these are essentially the same thing the difference is quantitative, not qualitative I don t buy his analysis completely But if he doesn t succeed in alerting you to a least a couple of games you re playing without realising it, then I really envy your ability to understand yourself and the things that motivate you. smart Falls into the category of books that give you the secret reason for why things happen the way they do.